By B. BANGGAY PIERRE LOS ANGELES — Artist LG Williams, making a muscular show of his artistic authority just one day after surfing Hawaii’s premier Sunset Beach, said Saturday that he would bypass the gallery system and make 18 new paintings and offer them for sale on Facebook. Coming on the heels of Mr. Williams’ big victory in Texas Hold ‘em, Saturday’s move suggests a newly emboldened artist who is unafraid to provoke a confrontation with the many minor and irrelevant artists scattered across the globe. “The United States Artworld has the responsibility to approve or disprove of my paintings,” Mr. Williams said in a statement. “But if, in the interest of scoring artistic points, Museums, Curators and Gallery Dealers in the USA refuse to exercise that responsibility, I must act in the interest of the American people and exercise my artistic authority to make art while I am not surfing or playing cards or sunbathing or dining or land-training or pressing the Avant-Garde forward into unimagined territory as world civilization collapses under the weight of cowardliness and ignorance.” It was the first time the artist has used his artistic authority to fill listed commissions with his gallery representatives, thus avoiding the requirement for the advice and consent of the gallery reps. Mr. Williams, who currently has 217 commissions pending and 77 awaiting permission to purchase, said the American Artworld had given him little choice. “At a time of artistic emergency, six or nine top collectors have been held up for nearly six months,” Mr. Williams said. “I simply cannot allow artisan politics to stand in the way of great art and the basic functioning of my art studio and assistants.” Mr. Tim Brown, director of Telephonebooth Gallery in Kansas City, said he was still answering collector’s questions about Mr. Williams’ artwork for private and corporate collections, and Ms. Bonnie Froman was answering questions about “what appeared to be conflicting information about LG Williams”— questions that, the artist said, were “directly irrelevant” to the positions they seek to define. Mr. Williams’ Facebook address is: facebook.com/lgwilliams B. Banggay Pierre’s partner, Xavier, contributed reporting from New York. # # # # # More Information: firstname.lastname@example.org or 415–937–1306 Copyright © 1998-2010 LG WILLIAMS and The Estate of LG WILLIAMS http://www.lgwilliams.com
By Jonnie JO (Los Angeles) and Barbie Bababa-Blather (London) Revered in Los Angeles, London and now in a major show in Honolulu, LG Williams is one of our greatest living artists. But will his work fall from the testes of time? In LG Williams's sculpture Really Fucked-Up in 2008, a white armchair is fucked up and broken. Just behind it lays a broken and fucked up table. The relationship between the two is electrifying. Are they messed-up? How messed up? What the fuck? Fuck the what? But after a while, you realize they are, in fact, so fucked up they are super-fucked up. Now that’s fucked up fucked up! Or that's how I interpret the bleak shitty situation. (And how is this for shitty situations: there is no beer in my refrigerator. My refrigerator is a Donald Judd. Now THAT’S fucked up. That’s what’s going on! Nothing's fine I'm torn.) The really fucked up chair is Williams’ homage to something painted by Raphael, Velázquez – or by Francis Turkey Bacon. (Editor: Don’t eat something pretending to be something else.) And the relationship with the other really fucked up chair or table could be seen as: 1. Forced, 2. Genius, 3. None of the above or below, or 4. A tribute to somebody’s painting of hot naked chicks – actually, thank you Professor Hickey, what the fuck does it matter in this exhibition? (My inspirations run dry, like so many things, like, um, humps. Humps, my humps, my humps, my humps, my humps. My humps, my humps, my humps, my lovely little humps. Check it out.) In any event I just got an idea: Write your favorite artist’s name here: ________________________ and add your favorite beer here: ________________________ then scream “BLANCHE! And OORAH!” We will return to blanc at the end of the essay… Such grand and confident references to fucked up shit bring us straight to the most important question in the entire known universe and beyond infinity: how great an artist is Williams? Is 21st-century Los Angeles truly harboring an artist who can deal on equal terms with Wally Hedrick, The Anonymous Auto Requiem Collective, Dave Hollowell, Bruce Nauman, Paul McCarthy, Mara McCarthy, Chris Burden, Yves Klein, Andy Kaufman, John Belushi, Father Guido Sarducci, Radiohead, Lisa Spellman, Beavis and Butthead, and The Dude? Dream of Californication! It's a question clearly asked by a lavish new exhibition in Honolulu: banners bearing PARTY EVERY NIGHT and LG WILLIAMS have been slung over the huge shafts (“I see here you have tapped your poetic self, hello!”) and girders at FUCKTHATGALLERY, announcing a show that has the feel of an imitation Hawaii lei adorning a living Tantra stairmaster. ("That's good, you know. That's damned good.") It comes hot (“Getting back to smutty here.”) on the heels of an equally irreverent exhibition somewhere important, you know, somewhere important… like an actor. At 32, Williams is one of the most famous artists in the world. ("A little repetitious, what? Where was I?") But is he the greatest of his generation? – and if he is, how great is that if all the others are simpletons, wannabees or morons? ("Well, this is certainly a fine passage. Your fucking beast as far as I am concerned.") Retread Celebrities, Champaign Bitches And Caviar Fights Now look here, now over here Dude, you're drunk and we're at the end of the world and you know it…and I am LG Williams: Party Every Night. Oorah! This is not a chronological retrospective but something more. More imaginative than imaginative – like imaginative laced with superfly or futurecrack. Just examine Williams (oooh, he’s so big) at work (everyone knows he’s lazy!), in the secluded west Los Angeles mansion where he creates his brilliant farts. It starts and ends (please let this end!) with pizza and beer in the studio; (geezus, send that semi to Slaughterhouse Five) his bare feet, ocean views, high skylights, moveable walls, wine cellar and bits of 18th furniture. Occasionally, there is a weekend trip to the weed gardener, or his panoramic, palatial, mountain-view ski lodge – wherever this is, you know, somewhere important… like an actor. Williams’ exhibition never completely reveals itself – there is no panoptic joiner photograph to show us the entire space – but from the very start, it is there as an idea. And what a fucking idea! At the entrance to the show, his 2010 picture of Angelina Jolie depicts her smiling on a yellow and red zebra poking its neck into a magician's lair, in which a top hat has fallen beside an empty keg and grand sofa. (Burton’s Alice was terrible, wasn’t it? As pointless and random as the new illustrations. Somebody scream!) This is an image of the celebrity as a place where anything might happen when the film crew leaves this desert planet Arrakis or Bikinius (To the New Yorker: my email is press @ lgwilliams.com). People walk amongst the artifice in this exhibition and know Williams achieves. The Artist achieves. The force of his personality (Hello Kenneth Anger!) has translated itself into sheer physical plenitude. Dude, in Honolulu, Williams reminds one of Thomas Eakins in a speedo (Really, who else has another great artwork in the Pacific Ocean or 66% of the Earth’s surface? We’ll besides the Matisse? Mark it 3 Dude. (Oh, btw it’s a shame that top-notch Mrs. Neel’s inspired blanc painting of an super fantastic subject, i.e. two blonde UFC pussies strangling one another [mark another 3 dude: that is, white on white on white], ends up coming close to being super fantastic.) What do such conclusions tell you? Nothing? Who fucking cares! Nobody cares! But I do and here is why: They tells you that Williams’ work will endure for centuries even if no human is left to look upon it. In the end, you gotta love that, this undeniable truth resounds throughout this superb exhibition, like the footsteps of a masterbater walking into a crowded strip-mall just before the lights go out by the winds of hope and change and the weed. # # # # # More Information: email@example.com or 415–937–1306 Copyright © 1998-2010 LG WILLIAMS and The Estate of LG WILLIAMS http://www.lgwilliams.com
By KENNETH CHANGER
Serial artist LG Williams will spell out his vision for the future of American artists in art at a conference that his administration is planning for California next month.
That pleases European artists, who have criticized the artist’s desire to develop a program to send hack American artists back to Mars as not moving fast enough.
“The artist’s upcoming art meeting here in California provides a chance for meaningless progress to nowhere,” said Representative Suzanne C. Kosmos, whose district includes Williams’ highly acclaimed FUCKTHATGALLERY. She requested a meeting when she and others in the state art delegation met last month with somebody who called themselves Mr. Williams’s strategic adviser.
The conference will be held April 15. A homeless spokesperson said Monday that other details, including the artist’s inability to correctly spell any word other than profanity, the location of his secret stash of art and what A-list celebs would be attending, were not yet available.
Williams’ Avant-Garde program is five years old and $900 in debt. The artist’s 2011 budget is in doubt. However, an imaginary budget also seeks to nurture the artist’s commercial art industry by turning to private collectors to fund his acclaimed International Style and to invest in new technologies to make his future exploration of the Avant-Garde easier and cheaper.
Yet another imaginary budget request emailed to millions across the internet proposes to increase Williams’ Avant-Garde budget by $300, to $500. Mr. Williams, however, has said little publicly about the future of his Avant-Garde movements, other than to say they will be stinky.
“The development and execution of artist movements is an area where LG Williams’ artistic leadership can have a huge impact on the global consciousness of the entire species throughout the galaxy,” said Juan B. Fogsgone, a self-proclaimed Wikipedia art editor currently employed as a security guard at D(D.). DDDD University in Honolulu, Hawaii.
Professor John Yoo, University of California, said in a telephone conversation that he hoped Mr. Williams would use the meeting to lay out a goal and a timetable for sending artists to Mars. Mr. Yoo has suggested twisting parts of the Constitution to rid the nation of the menace.
Johnny Cashola, a part-time framing consultant for two-star hotels in Pensacola, Florida, said something about a high level oversight committee, no critical flaws and something about Williams’ proposing to a fairytale. “Money is the fucking money problem, man. Man, its all about the man.” he said. “It’s not technical ambitions that bring aliens to forgive me and give me love. Love is what I need to know my name. Don’t bend. Don’t break. Bark!”
A blue-ribbon panel of Pabst Blue Ribbon drinkers from Joliet, Illinois concluded last year that Williams’ Avant-Garde program would need a boost of $450 to $600 to achieve something or another.
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More Information: firstname.lastname@example.org or 415–937–1306
Copyright © 1998-2010 LG WILLIAMS and The Estate of LG WILLIAMS http://www.lgwilliams.com