By Pauline Thugman, New York Times
A fucking Art freeze? That’s the brilliant response of LG Williams to his sixty-ninth fucking serious artistic setback…
It’s appalling on every fucking level.
It’s bad fucking practice, depressing demand for LG’s avant-garde artworks when art collectors are still suffering from a decade of bad fucking art. What the fuck! Jonnie Jackoff writes in Artforum that LG seems to have decided to fire his masseuses and replace them with an incredible new art idea: “reinstate Norman Rockwell style pictorial values during the American financial crisis”. LMAO!
True, it’s a novel, risky idea – albeit Picasso went ‘classico’ during World War I almost a century ago. “But it might just work, people will buy fucking anything with a naked lady eating a hotdog!” says the artist during an interview yesterday while panhandling in cardboard box in a dark fucking alley in Monte Carlo. He was here to entertain some wealthy collectors who quickly kicked him out on the street for his continuous use of profanity around the patron’s five children.
However, many critics agree that it’s bad long-run art policy, shifting attention away from the essential needs to LG’s avant-garde art reform and focusing on LG making some quick cash with cheap, realistic trickery and naked chicks recruited from Hooters.
And it’s a betrayal of everything LG’s supporters thought they were working for. Just like that, LG has embraced and validated the fucking regressive artworld-view — and more specifically, he has embraced the fucking policy ideas of his luxury envy, dollar worshiping opponents. A correspondent writes, “I feel like an idiot for supporting this LG. He sucks now. He’s not getting any more free pussy from me or my girlfriends.”
But, I still cling to a sexual fantasy with LG: maybe, just possibly, LG is going to tie his art freeze to something incredible that would actually help avant-garde art, like fart credits for fucking space aliens from Planet Viagras. (But, don’t count on it). There has been no hint of anything like that in the fart press so far. Right now, LG is looking like pure fucking disaster.
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